When I first started my business I had no idea what I was doing. Coming out of 16 years in the corporate world, I thought I had it going on. I was full of bravado and a wealth of experience and so I just KNEW I was going to make it.

Yes, I had the belief. Because for so long I would wake up and SEE this picture of myself in my head. I didn’t just see this future version of myself. I could FEEL her, inside of me. So much so, that some days it would literally PAIN me to my core. That’s how I knew it was real. This whole thing inside of my head. Even though everyone else was telling me:
– You can’t do that
– You can’t make money from that
– It’s all a fantasy
– Don’t ruin a good thing and stay where you are!

I just couldn’t. Like seriously.
In the same pattern, the same life, the same ME.
I knew there was more. I had this dream. This knowing. This fucking CALLING that was so deep that right now as I think back and put myself in that space, I’m seriously trembling from the intensity.

I was shit scared. Yet so certain at the same time.
I had no idea what to do. Yet I got up every day and did SOMEthing. I remember in the first week of starting my business, I would sit at my desk, twiddle my thumbs and think, right – ok, what do I do now?

I didn’t have a business plan.
I didn’t have a product
I didn’t have a website
I didn’t have a social media presence
I didn’t have anything really other than a DREAM, a VISION.
And a deep, burning desire to bring this thing to life.

So that I could get on purpose. So I could become ALL I was meant to become in this lifetime and so I could live the life I was BORN for. Do work with meaning, create change in the world, innovate, create. Empower, inspire. Make a fucking difference.

So I pushed on, every single day.
No matter what.
Whether I sat there and did nothing but journal.
Or I went out for a coffee with people from my previous life and through speaking with them about the work I was called to do, I became clear. I started to build a community, a following, a client base. That’s another story entirely to be honest, which I’ll save for another post. The point is, I just MOVED. I did SOMEthing. Even though I didn’t know what or how.

Here’s what I want you to know and the reason I share this with you today from depths of my soul and the bottom of my heart.

It’s because I SEE you beautiful
I see you there, looking like you’ve got it going on. You’re a gun, seriously. I also see so much MORE in you, the stuff you’re hiding and playing down.

I know you have a dream. I know you’ve been contemplating taking the leap. I know you’re scared too. I mean, it’s not an easy thing to jump head first without any idea about what you’re going to do, or how you’re going to do it.

And at the same time, this same feeling excites you so damn much. Because you know deep down inside, in your gut this is the challenge you have been waiting for. This is the LIFE you’ve been waiting for and you know I’m talking to you right now because you can feel those shivers up your spine and those butterflies in your tummy.

You KNOW that even though you’re shit scared that you’re DONE and you’re ready. You know that if you don’t stand up and give in to this calling that has been tugging and now fucking SCREAMING at you – that you’re just going to die a slow, painful internal death. And externally, you’ve be living a long laborious life of sacrifice.

Of making do.
Of putting up and shutting up.
Of going through life knowing that you COULD have, SHOULD have
But didn’t.

Because you were scared. You didn’t know HOW.

It’s the hardest thing to do, move through fear. Know this –
It is the only way that you can get to the part where you’re courageous.

Courage doesn’t come before you do the thing.
Courage comes to you AS you do the thing.

You already have everything you need.

You have your dream.
You have wifi.
And courage baby, courage is just waiting for you to say YES

For you to stop fighting.
Waiting for you to stand up and give in to the dream.
Courage is waiting for you on the other side of fear.

So beautiful.
Know that I love you
Know that I have your back.

I see you. Not only as you are now, but as ALL of you.
ALL you are meant to be.
Don’t let her down.
She’s waiting for you.

Get Your Shit Together, It’s Time…

Much Love,

Christine X


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